Truth is so many people will never get any further than they currently are for this one main reason…….They possess and live off of the woe is me, Ive been defeated mentality. What is that? It’s the prison in your mind that keeps you chained to your past, who hurt you, what you didn’t have, who took what, what mom did, why dad wasn’t there, what you have lost , your financial status, etc so on. I know you are thinking, well I cant get over it,
they have to pay, or it hurt so bad you cant get over it.
Well listen here, you holding on to all that aged negativity or experiences that you can not take back or change is definitely not teaching anyone a lesson, if anything it should be showing you just how much it is not helping yours. Many hold on to this stuff because it has built their foundation and without the constant reminder of what “had” been they have no idea who they are or how to change it. I of all people know the struggle of the past and fear of letting go, but how can you build a new foundation if you hold on to the past. Im not sure if we totally grasp the fact that all the baggage we hold on to, whether knowingly or unknowingly affects our lives in so many ways. It affects our relationships intimately, platonic wise, business wise and even affects you spiritually, emotionally, socially, & financially. Failing to address,resolve and let go of hurtful, hindering memories will cause you to be unable to build friendships with new people and many times even affect you in choosing hobbies or career options, so you never heal and eventually put all of that on someone else. You must change the way you look at life, your circumstances and your experiences. With each journey , trial and uncomfortable place you face in life we must began to see these things as opportunities to grow and evolve into who we are truly destined as individuals to be. Is this easy. NO. But it is necessary. Every living being will experience what they consider to be unbearable, unfortunate situations in life, its all apart of it, but its not why you go through it that is the question , it is what you learn while you go through it that is. If you go about things as if you are defeated, then guess what? You will be. If you go through things with the mind frame of, drop me in a lion’s den and pray for the lion, then YOU WIN. It will hurt, it will be uncomfortable but you will evolve, you will come out better, wiser and more flexible than ever before. Remember nothing happens to you, it happens for you, and it is happening because it is apart of your greater purpose. Dont fight it. Because I guarantee you this one thing, with or without your permission it will still happen, its up to you to decide how you will adapt while it does.
Let Go of the things in your past that do not benefit you , if you can’t use it now, and it doesn’t add joy into your life or help you heal & prosper in any way, why in the world do you want to hold on to dead weight?
How do you let it go? Well I don’t exactly know what you are going through or have held on to, but i can share with you what has helped me.
- Understand what you are holding on to, and why?
- accept your part if any that you may have contributed to the situation. example, relationships take 2 to go bad, yes even when cheating is involved.:)
- Decide if anger , hurt, bitterness etc is better to hold on to than letting it go.
- accept that each person is on their own journey and that includes imperfection, understand that this does not make them a bad person. People grow at different levels and you have to accept people where they are on theirs, however you dont have to accept or tolerate the treatment that comes with that.
- Forgive. Yes Forgive them , because they cant feel your hurt, or inward bitterness, only you can, and it causes all kind of health problems that really is just not worth the load they will carry. this also means forgiving yourself.
- Change from the familiar. Old routines, old relationships, old hangout spots,etc. No need in still engaging in past behaviors looking to get over the past it will never work. Let Go.
Avoid jumping into a new relationship or rebound situation. This only complicates the process, give yourself time to get to know yourself forreal, otherwise say hello to the repeated cycle. I am rooting for you on this #JourneyToBetter Phase 2, trust me I know it is not easy, remember im taking this with you also! You are not alone, but you must commit to yourself to be a better version of yourself, it takes work, persistence and determination to succeed at mastering YOURSELF.