Journey To Better Phase 2- Day 6 : You Must Learn The Truth About Who You WERE, In Order To Embrace Who You Are.

Journey to better is an amazing Series, Not only because you get to become better, stronger and more confident in your own life but also because through your transformation you will be able to inspire others to do the same. One thing I have learned from Phase 1 is that people are inspired by change, now that is whether positive or negative, good and bad , the fact remains people love change. However I also realized the just as many  are also afraid of it.. They

would rather stay the same and comfortable because in order to change you will be in a space of unfamiliar territory. That alone is frighting! I mean lets be honest when you have lived your life in a certain way, with certain values, morals, traditions, etc, it is almost offensive for someone to insist that you even need to change, It is as if they are saying being you is not good enough or in many minds it’s wrong (  the ones who hold the converting complex, you know that thing i call the need for people to think, live, act and like exactly how they do or you of course are all wrong.) However in all honesty this couldn’t be further away from the truth. Change is inevitable, and necessary for any one to evolve. And while many know this to be true, they also are very limited in the areas in their life they are willing or ready to evolve in. I remember when I began my original journey 2 year ago, it was hard for me to let go of everything i thought i knew about who I was, and i couldn’t understand why I had to. But i discovered i had to because what I was taught whether it be about religion, love, life, success, finances, sex, intimacy( yes they are different) Men, women, emotions, health, drugs and anything else you can think of, was not necessarily what I felt to be true, and the perception I may have had regarding any of the topics or others, where solely created and planted in me by  my surroundings,& what I was taught by adults, schools etc. It was not exactly my point of view. So i began to ask myself questions on my quest to self discovery, and decided I would start over. yes I would start over mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, and began to find out who I was really. This was not easy, and i cant lie and say I didnt think about just forgetting about my whole “discovery” idea, but i also knew that unless I was willing to do the work, I would not be able to truly be introduced to my utimate self. I had to do the work, I could no longer accept who I had been taught I was , i had to really find out. BUT how can you begin on a quest of finding yourself, if you dont and are not willing to accept the hard truths. Beginning with my Culture’s history. I know what you are probably thinking( uh oh i should probably exit this post right now because it will get really uncomfortable, but no, it wont well maybe ,just listen ). Truth is, I am a woman who is proud to be an African American Woman. I mean I love my culture, but i discovered I needed to know more about it, than the surface truth they told us in school, or even more that the movies may teach us. I needed to know everything. I realized after research and studying countless books, documentaries, visiting museums and so much more, that what I thought I knew I had No idea. But I didn’t just stop there, I studied not only my history but other cultural Histories as well. Why? Because there is one thing to know where you are from and how it has impacted your life, But to learn someone else’s cultural history is just as important. Only then will you realize the pain, pride and perseverance of another race. It taught me how to accept differences, how to embrace mistakes, and it also revealed to me just how much people really did not know. We are all for the most part living on what we have been programmed to believe and very few have taken the initiative to learn outside of that. Those that do, well they turn out to be the great ones. There is no way to truly learn who you are and evolve as a person if you don’t tear down those walls and build based on your true belief of who you are. The reason so many are racist, hate men, hate women, kill each other, tear each other down, destroy souls,  financially unstable, angry, bitter, struggle, lack education, are extremely religious etc so on, is because that is what they have been taught and programmed to believe is normal  ” right”  or the only way to survive. They haven’t been introduced to anything different because that is all they have known, and so when someone different comes alone, often times its when they resort to “converting tactics” or tearing them down. You Must discover why you love how you love, why you believe what you believe, who risked it all generations before you to have doors open for your generation now.  Through understanding comes, accepting that everyone is different. Everyone has a HISTORY and a present. YOU are No Different. But Tolerance, Diversity and coexisting is what counts. Write down the things you believe in, things you value, traditions you practice, and ask yourself why? Why do you believe these things,why are they important. Learn about the history of your family, such as the longevity of marriage rate, success rate, what the history of your family was, health wise. You have to learn about the foundation you are standing on to truly understand who you are or what to change. Once you do this you will discover how many things will be put into perspective, and then you can began the change process in the hardest spots of your being. Through this you will discover who you truly are. #BMichavery