Journey to Better Phase 2- Day 4- Remove the Clutter!

clutter

 

Lets face it, we have goals  we want to achieve and things we desire to have in life but there are a few things holding us back. Old Hurt, old baggage from childhood, anger issues, lack of self-control, lack of organizational skills, no actual plan of how to work towards the goals you want set, home is chaotic, lacking stability, old traditions, phone log full of too many ” In case of  people”  You know the ones, you call in case you are drunk texting,or in case you are bored, or in case you wanna gossip, etc so on. Not that these things feed into your life to assist in growth, but because they “Fill” your life to take up the empty space you can’t figure out within yourself to actual address. Those are stand by drainers. As dysfunctional as they may be , and  no matter how  miserable you may be around them, you can’t get enough. Well this is the reason you cant become who you are destined to become, because you refuse to release the ties that bind you to  you a comfortable place. You would rather be around and within familiarity oppose to adapting to the unfamiliar because it seems more relatable. Imagine how much better you would feel if you actually achieved the things you say you want to do. Wouldn’t that be amazing? Well let me give you some tips that helped me, I wont act as if it was easy because it was not, but it was necessary and worth it!

 

  • Change your perception of who you think you are– You have to get rid of the programmed thoughts on what you think you know about yourself, because until you do, you will only be able to go as far as your mind allows.

Continue reading “Journey to Better Phase 2- Day 4- Remove the Clutter!”

B.Michavery”s thoughts on “Women”s Intuition” and Cheating”

Wow…

OK this topic can be very complex depending on who is discussing it…Now of course Most men will assume this Blog will be biased and full of male bashing BUT its NOT. I am a realist so i definitely know that there are many different sides to this very controversial topic. First in order to determine what Cheating is and how it affects people involved, you would first have to determine what you consider to be cheating. Now whether you know it or not cheating is more than a physical thing, and due to men and women thinking  and acting  diffrently, its very important to take into consideration that their perspectives of “cheating” can be totally different. It doesn’t excuse the fact by no means, however it must be taken into consideration in order to clearly understand the total picture.

  •    Forms of Cheating: Emotional, mentally , physical And in some cases spiritually(I will explain stay with me)…..

Emotional: This happens when a party is solely connected to the other party based on feelings and emotion filled vibes, this could be what happens when someone is able to express different feelings, thoughts etc without feeling judged or embarrassed , and able to be themselves freely (or so they think) which can cause one to feel “in love” .This can be a very dangerous thing!

Mental : This happens when one is connected intellectually! If someone has you in tune mental wise in most cases it can be a lost cause, You know the saying….When you have the mind you can have ANYTHING….this can only happen through conversations and connecting ways regarding views on life, experiences etc. Mental cheating is having an intimate relationship with someone that you most likely  never meet in person.  This differs from long distance cheating because the distance doesn’t matter, the parties involved will most likely never meet and probably have very little desire to do so.

Physical: This is the obvious!…Its when the woman’s  “TOOTIE POO” and the man’s “PECKER DING” Meet….:)

Spiritual:This typically happens when two are conflicted on religious views and find the comfort in like minded individuals , while yes this seems harmless but it can cause issues if two married or committed individuals don’t find a common ground, depending on how spiritual or religious one is is can destroy a relationship. (being spiritual and religious are two different things).

Now for me of course Cheating is simple> If you are doing anything that the other party is not aware of and would not condone then you are cheating simple!…Conversations that are inappropriate , meeting up, some people being flirty can be a open door to something else, depending on how far the flirting goes… And i have been in a relationship with a cheater, and i will tell you now…NEVER AGAIN!..I don’t care how many say a cheater can change..Most times they wont.. I see it this way even if it takes you 5 years to do it again…you always have the possibility once you have done it to repeat it again. Its just a matter of getting caught for most. Now this may not apply to all cheaters! But the majority! Its possible to do it again…But then again its to each its own…..Only you know how much you can take and if you can try to grow from it. But always follow the Little voice within…(men and women)…..cheating is not gender biased!…Its universal and You are the one who knows your breaking point!…Remember if you continue to allow the same mistakes to be done its no one Else’s fault but yours..anything done repeatedly is no longer a mistake it is a habit! And those at times can be unbreakable.

  1. Tips: Don’t own the cheat!…Don’t make excuses like, its something “i didn’t do ” that made him/she do it, NO Truth is regardless, they made the decision because they wanted to. No matter what the reason, Remember you can be seduced by something your not attracted to( you know the law of attraction) Ex, if i don’t think a elephant is sexy there is NO way it can make me wanna have Sex) J/S!!
  2. Stop making excuses to why it was done!…
  3. Anything that hinders you , from growing in life, emotionally, mentally, financially, and career wise  etc let it go! Stop allowing it to destroy your self esteem and confidence. How you treat yourself is a reflection on how others treat you!.
  4. If yo catch them cheating>>>>STOP GOING AFTER THE OTHER PARTY THAT THEY CHEATED WITH!…LADIES YOU HAVE THIS BAD!!!….she has no commitment to you…not making it right but he is the one who has vowed to be faithful NOT HER.. …handle him accordingly!.
  5. And finally realize you can’t change him /her….YOU ARE NOT THEIR PARENT. its not your job to mold them into who you want them to be…they either are or they are not!!…Stop holding on solely because you are delusional about them changing!!…If there is anything about them in the beginning that you don’t like or cant deal with …take heed and make your decision to move forward accordingly!…

…#B.Michavery/Ceo/Founder

Nique’s Thoughts on “Women’s Intuition and Forms of Cheating”

 Segment of Intuition Speaks 

 “Women’s Intuition and Forms of Cheating”  

 

Hey dolls and gents and welcome to the first segment of “Intuition Speaks.” Let me introduce myself for those who don’t know. My name is Dominique “Nique” Dixon, and I’m the Executive Assistant to  the T.A.T.O.O. Campaign and the members of it. That is not the only thing I do though, but we will get to that a little later. Recently there has been a lot of coversation regarding these topics, well around me there has, and today I just decided to speak on it. Now to srart off because I know there going to be some eye rolling, wtf moments, and name calling. I want to make this clear…THIS IS MY POINT OF VIEW!!!! You can love it or hate because frankly I don’t care.

Now since introductions are over, here is how this will go:

(1)  Nique’s Thoughts on the above subjects. (This post)

(2) Q & A Nique’s & CWill’s Answers (Next post)

 

Let’s begin the conversation:

 

Woman’s Intution:

 

Let’s start off by figuring out wth is it. So I went to my trusted sidekick Mrs. Google (yes google is a woman, she needs too much to be a dude. Lol j/p) and the first thing that caught my eye was  this answer:

Actually I think its an old-fashioned way of belittling women’s intelligence, by suggesting that it comes from some mystical emotional place, rather than anywhere rational or from considered analysis of facts, as men’s knowledge does. It’s been reclaimed lately as just another way of saying “I feel it in my bones.” or “I’m sure of this, but I don’t have any basis for that. When the feeling is experienced by a woman. Of course, the same feeling could easily be experienced by a man. Usually all it means is that your basis for the belief is in your sub-concious, rather than something you’ve conciously thought out, which is why it seems to be correct so often.“ (if you didn’t know, yes a dude said it)

Hold on…I’m back, had to count to 10 for that one, but for the most part (meaning the end) it’s correct. A women’s intuition is on of the strongest things you can hold. Now I did say WOMAN and NOT girl. Now me I think mines is a little stonger because of my sign (#TeamPisces) and we already are inate to things of the sorts, but that’s just me being bias J. Now on the real tip it can truly be a blessing or a curse, and if you do have a feeling like something just isn’t adding up or is not right, communicate with your mate. If you still having that feeling afterwards then do like Madea said “keep asking questions.” You’ll get the answer you need to clear that feeling. Although you may not like it at the end.

 

Forms of Cheating:

 

Let’s get ready to rumble! Sorry I’m just totally in another world right now. Don’t know how I’m making it through this blog w/o throwing my laptop, but I’m doing it. Now to my knowledge and checking in with Ms. Google again I have come to the conclusion that there are (drum roll please)…5 forms of cheating. Hahaha you thought it was going to be some crazy number didn’t you? Don’t think anything about it because I did to. Anyways here they are:

  1. Opportunistic: occurs when a partner is in love and attached to a spouse, but succumbs to their sexual desire for someone else. Typically, this type of cheating is driven by situational circumstances or opportunity, risk-taking behavior, and alcohol or drug use.
    1. Obligatory: This type of infidelity is based on fear. Fear that resisting someone’s sexual advances will result in rejection. People may have feelings of sexual desire, love and attachment for a spouse, but still end up cheating because they have a strong need for approval. In addition, their need for approval can cause them to act in ways that are at odds with their other feelings. In other words, some people cheat, not because they want to cheat, but because they need the approval that comes along with a having the attention of others. (NO EXCUSES THOUGH)
    2. Romantic: This type of infidelity occurs when the cheater has very little emotional attachment to his/her spouse. They may be committed to their marriage and making it work but they long for an intimate, loving connection with a member of the opposite sex. More than likely their commitment to the marriage will prevent them from ever leaving their spouse. Romantic infidelity means pain for the other man/other woman and the cheating spouse.Rarely does it turn into a long-term, committed relationship. Marital problems have to be quite severe before a spouse will leave the marriage for another person.
    3. Conflicted Romantic: This type of infidelity occurs when people experience genuine love and sexual desire for more than one person at a time. Despite our idealistic notions of having only one true love, it is possible to experience intense romantic love for multiple people at the same time. While such situations are emotionally possible, they are very complicated and tend to create a lot of anxiety and stress. In this case, cheating spouses, in their attempt not to cause anyone harm, often end up hurting everyone. (HMMM)
    4. Commemorative: This type of infidelity occurs when people are in a committed relationship, but have no feelings for that person. There is no sexual desire, or love or attachment, only a sense of commitment keeps a couple together. These people justify cheating by telling themselves they have the right to look for what they are not getting in their present relationship.It is important, for the sake of appearances that the present relationship last. The cheater does not want to be viewed as a failure so they stay in an unhappy relationship and seek to fulfill their needs outside the relationship.

Very Interesting,  isn’t it? Now don’t get me wrong I don’t condone cheating in no way form or fashion, and I’m not making exuses for anyone. I’m just looking at it from a non bias person view point. Even though that is extremely hard at this point of time, but I do want to go on the record of saying the meaning to these forms of cheating are not mine, but they did have me open my eyes. Now as to why people cheat that is a whole different topic, and you going have to view that on our youtube channel webisode roundtable. I will let you know when it’s posted.

 

In Conclusion:

I hoped you enjoyed my first blog. I was so amped up about writing about these topics and I hope I didn’t bore you too much. If I did…IDGAD, don’t read next time. I decided to keptmy article PG since it was my first, but I wont promise you the same on the Q&A. Cwill  and myself have some answers that may blow your mind. I will be posting those tomorrow so check back, and stay tuned for more blog post from B.Michavery, Drastic, and yours truly. We’re REVAMPED and getting down to the bottom of so many taboo topics I mean that is what our campaign name is based off of…Talking About Things Others Oppose.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Read more: What exactly is “women’s intuition” supposed to be? | Answerbag http://www.answerbag.com/q_view/25171#ixzz20FKh0Jtj